A powerful voice for the voiceless

Funny how we stumble into the phenonemal stories. In this case, I blame my Dirt Devil vacuum cleaner. It needed fixing, so I took it to Sew n' Vac about three weeks ago. When I arrived at the Bonner Mall, pushing the Dirt Devil in front of me, the store was empty. I groaned but soon saw a sign stating that they'd moved down by Sears.

So, I pushed on. The owner was helping another lady with her vacuum cleaner, so I talked to his assistant who looked really familiar. Turns out I knew her when. When was when Harold's Foods was still open and she was a checker. Her daughter was one of my students back in the early '90s.

"How's Pam?" I asked. That's when I learned Pam's life had taken a cruel twist, but I also learned that Pam has twisted back. The SUV accident about six years ago took a toll on her relatively comfortable life---both medically and financially. It was a tough story to hear as her mother gave me some details. After listening, I encouraged Pam's mom to give her the SHS alumni site address so she could reconnect with her old teacher and old friends.

Last week, Pamela Stangel Roberts' name showed up on the site. I immediately wrote to her and welcomed her aboard. Since then, I've received two letters. I've also searched out a story written by the Spokesman-Review's Melodie Little about Pamela in 2004. In all three cases, I believe Pamela's saga demonstrates some wonderful insights into the human spirit. So, I've included them for readers' enjoyment today.

Here goes-----from the Spokesman-Review:

Three years ago, a sport utility vehicle T-boned Pamela Roberts' middle-class life.

The car crash caused debilitating injuries that transformed her future into a struggle for survival. As her bills piled up, she nearly became homeless.

"I just never realized what that five seconds was going to do to the rest of my life," Roberts said.

Roberts, the mother of a daughter, 7, and son, 11, wrote and recorded a song about her experiences called "No Tomorrow." The song is part of a new CD titled "The Voiceless Among Us," a collection of songs and poems about homelessness.

About 40 at-risk men, women and children, age 3 and older, shared stories and feelings that became songs and poems, which the group performs.

"I was totally surprised that no matter what your situation was before, when you need help you end up with this stigma that says, 'You're poor, you're nothing,' " Roberts said.

The man behind the project is Redhawk, also known as the Rev. Michael Rice Sauer of Covenant Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) at 57th and Palouse Highway.

He contacted Spokane Neighborhood Action Programs, which found a group of homeless volunteers to participate. Using a portable recording studio that his congregation allowed him to purchase in lieu of his taking a church-sponsored sabbatical, Redhawk spent about 400 hours collaborating on songs, writing, recording and mixing music for the CD.

As a spiritual leader, songwriter, musician and poet, Redhawk hopes the endeavor will put a human voice on the problem of homelessness.

"We minimize people by not paying attention to who they are," Redhawk said.

The CD is available for $12.99 through Auntie's Bookstore and Borders. It's also available through SNAP (456-7111) and Covenant Christian Church (448-1311). Money raised will benefit SNAP programs for the homeless.

The group started meeting in February and recording wrapped up in November. As the creative process unfolded, Redhawk uncovered stories of heartache and triumph. He wanted to capture the children's joy and sadness, which reshaped his views of society.

"It feels very much like every man for himself and women and children be damned," Redhawk said. "I don't think God is going to let us get away with that."

Jennifer Martin, east office coordinator for SNAP, said some families moved from short-term transitional housing into permanent housing as the "Voiceless" project progressed.

During the course of performing together, a core group of seven families bonded into a community, Martin recalls. Women cooked meals and shared experiences as their children played and drew pictures together. A drawing by 9-year-old Katie Van Voorhis became the CD's cover.

The CD opens with a choir of children cheerfully counting down into a whimsical song about planets.

From there, listeners enter an adult world with spine-tingling lyrics about a woman's battle to find self-identity while the world just stares: "You just pass me by. I see you shake your head, like I'm already dead - homeless."

Ten-year-old Harley Bates' poem, "Magic and Life," shares his dream of helping poor people by pulling money, food and happiness out of a magician's hat.

In "No Tomorrow," Roberts says at age 29 "things were going fine." As the song continues, her life deteriorates. Frightened and alone, the chorus asks, "Where will we go and where will we be with no tomorrow?"

Looking back, Roberts, who lacked health insurance at the time of the accident, recalls having up to 11 doctor and therapist appointments each week and spending $500 a month on prescriptions. Her son is asthmatic and has a foot disability and the bills were overwhelming.

After losing her job, she fell behind on rent and utilities. The family was in danger of getting evicted when Roberts started seeking help. One state worker after another turned down her requests and told her to take her kids to a homeless shelter.

"You are treated like you are just nothing, like you have no place in society," Roberts explained.

When she was referred to SNAP, Roberts, who considers herself a strong person, was at the end of her rope.

"You can only take it for so long, it's just so hard," Roberts recalled. "SNAP said, 'Oh God, you need some help' and that was the turning point right there."

SNAP moved Roberts and her family into a transitional apartment, then into a permanent assisted rental unit that eventually qualified for assistance through the Spokane Housing Authority. They repaired her car and enrolled her in classes to learn to deal with her new financial situation.

Roberts used her experience as the former operations manager of Express Personnel Services to teach a SNAP class that helps people find employment. From there, she lent her voice to the CD.

More than anything, she wants people to see themselves in the CD's music and poetry. "Everybody needs to look around and say, 'What do I have to give?' Because someday that might be me."

As Roberts, now a college student, struggles to reinvent her life while dealing with intense pain, her vocal legacy implores people not to look away.

"So when you see someone on the street with holy shoes upon their feet. Please remember. ..."

From Pam's first email:

Mom said that she filled you in a little on the roller coaster ride that has been my life. A lot of people say that it is terrible how much I have been through in the past 5 years, but I guess I don't look at it that way (at least not most of the time...I do have my days!). I guess being in a car accident that has thus far disabled me is not the most pleasant thing, but I have learned many things along the way and I have a deeper appreciation of the simple things in life than I might have ever had if things had been differently. It's all part of the journey as far as I am concerned.

I have two wonderful children. My oldest just turned 14! His name is Tyler and let me tell ya...he is one big boy! My youngest is Megan and she turned 10 in January. I don't know if everyone feels this way, but my life is my kids and I would be lost without them. I feel that the measure of life is not in how much money you make, but in how much you appreciate the miracle that is being a mother. It is not always easy, but it is always worth it.

Wow, I feel like I am rambling on. I actually have a purpose to writing this so I should probably get to it. I wanted to thank you for the wonderful teacher that you were for me. I walked out of your classes with a profound love for writing and it has served me well. I have been told many times over the years what an eloquent speaker I am. I attribute most of that to the lessons I learned from you. I began my adventure with public speaking after my accident. My children and I were about to end up on the street when a wonderful homeless organization gave us a helping hand. That day began my mission to help others who are in danger of becoming homeless or those who have already landed there. I began by speaking at fundraisers and before I knew it I was standing on the lawn of the Washington State Capitol Building in Olympia giving a press conference with two of the state representatives. Since then, I have talked all over the state and have even had Governor Gregoire come to my home for a live interview. I believe that I was given my ability to speak out for this very purpose.

I have also been involved with a choir comprised of homeless families called The Voiceless. We have raised over $10,000 dollars in the past few years and are still going strong. We have a cd out, on which I perform a song which I wrote about the journey that my family took through homelessness. I would love to have your address so that I could send it to you. My kids are on the cd as well and my son even performs a solo song. My daughter is now at the age of ten also beginning to do some public speaking for this cause. I couldn't be prouder of these kids. With peer-pressure the way it is, I am so amazed at their ability to speak out about this cause. I guess I must be doing something right!

From her second email:

As for my story, parts of it have been told in various articles, some of which were in the Spokesman. I would be happy to forward them on to you but am always more than ready to talk to anyone about what happened in my life. I want to make sure that everyone realizes how fragile and precarious a life of security and comfort truly is. I want people to also realize that homelessness affects people from all walks of life...even the hard-working and successful. How true it is that we live in a very self-absorbed world. That truth has a lot to do with why I tell my story. I don't necessarily believe that everyone does it on purpose but I do feel that the world would be so much better if every person made a change in their own priorities.

Now that I have your address, I will also mail you a copy of our cd. I hope you will listen to it and share it with others. Maybe our group can come to Sandpoint and perform someday. I would love to share our musical journey through being homeless with the people in my home town.


So, there you go. I hope Pam's story inspires readers as much as it did me. I'm glad my Dirt Devil needed to be repaired.