Say only what you mean; only say what you mean

Okay, so which one is correct in the title today? I just heard a news reporter misuse "only" on the KXLY Morning Show while I was only hoping to watch Bootsie who's supposed to be on the show this morning talking only of his BEANS recipes.

The reporter was talking about alcohol and what kinds customers could buy at a certain area store. She said you could "only buy vodka" and some other alcohol product (which I didn't catch cuz I was so caught up on her misuse of 'only') at that particular store.

So that means that's all you can do once you go inside that business. You can't go to the bathroom. You cannot visit with the owner. You can't shoplift. All you can do when you go inside is buy that vodka or that unnamed drink----nothing else. Not even drink the stuff. Just buy the vodka or the other product and get the heck out of there.

Of course, if she had used "only" correctly, I wouldn't feel so bad about going into that store. If I knew you can buy only vodka and some other drink, I'd still feel comfortable about going in, buying my vodka, having a sip or two, visiting with other customers and then using the store's restroom.

"Only" is just a little word, but using it in the wrong place in a sentence can make a big difference in the meaning conveyed by what you have just said. Of course, most folks could care less how it's used. They get the gist, but there are a few of us quirky sharp-eared English teacher types who cue in on the mistake and who love to envision the true scenario of what the person has just said.

The general rule for "only" is to use it in the general vicinity of whatever word or phrase it modifies or describes. When you stick it somewhere else in the sentence, you modify or change the meaning of what you really mean to say.

For instance, if I went to the garden last night and only picked my tomatoes, that means I did nothing else in my garden. I did not smile with delight while looking at the cucumbers coming back from the dead. I did not bend down to pull a few more of the thousands of weeds that keep emerging from the dirt. I simply went straight to the tomato patch, picked one ripe tomato and left.

In contrast, if I went to the garden last night and picked only tomatoes, then I also had the right to pull weeds, admire the volunteer cosmos blossoms, shake my head at the slim pickin's in this year's corn crop or even change the sprinkler.

Say only you mean; mean only what you say.

How about, "I only have five dollars"?

That means I have nothing else in this world. Poor me. I'm going to have to make some rigid choices on what I'll do with that five dollars so I'll be able to possess something else in this world besides moola.

So, if I say, "I have only five dollars," that could mean I have a bunch of other stuff in my pocket, in my house, on our place or maybe even at someone else's house where I left my cowboy boots last week.

The money situation needs some help, though, so I've gotta take some of those possessions and try to sell them on the free Sandpoint Online Classifieds to up my bank account.

Say only what you mean; mean only what you say.

That said, I need only to complete this sentence and then get the heck out of the house before some disgusted reader calls me up and says, "Is that the only thing you had on your mind this morning when that poor reporter was trying so hard to tell the public about the vodka and where you could only buy it or some other alcoholic beverage? Shame on you. Get a life!"

To which I would reply, "If only I had found Bootsie and the bean recipes on the TV show, this discussion never would have come up."