Thursday, December 13, 2012

Good News: CALM down

Yeah, 12-12-12 was a pretty big day for a lot of folks, but I'm thinking 12-13-12 is fairly monumental too.

I just learned that I can calm down and that I don't need to work as hard while watching TV.  

Along with stories about mass murders and political bickering about physical cliffs---or was that fisticuffs---and updates on Lindsay Lohan being denied probation, there is good news about how our lives will change, and the great news is that it all starts today.

Because of the CALM Act, we no longer need to fumble around looking for the remote every time a commercial airs.

We can sit back, relax and maybe even take a catnap while waiting for the next segment of whatever show we happen to be watching.

From this day forth,  the TV gods will have to match noise levels of regular TV programming whenever commercials air.

No longer will advertisers be allowed to blast us out of the house or wake us up from the stupor we entered five minutes into our favorite 7 p.m. program.


That could have a bad side too.  That could mean I'll sleep through the entire 55 remaining minutes of "60 Minutes," rather than awaking to the rude sounds of someone trying to sell their product for "when the moment is right." 

At least, the commercials do bring me back into consciousness and I do get to watch a few minutes of the next segment of my program before drifting off again.

Still, when I AM awake, it has disordered my mind to search all over the couch and the table next to it for the remote several times a night to muffle THAT LOUD OBNOXIOUS SOUND of the guy trying to sell me the perfect brownie pan---ya know, the one with the rack with a handle which separates the brownies so you can just lift them out of the pan rather than eating half the brownies that flake off while you're trying to remove them from the pan the old-fashioned way.

Yup, the effort to make our lives easier continues, and in some ways those efforts are good; in others, maybe not so good.

On this 12-13-12 morning, I'm wondering if Bill is ever gonna hear another commercial.  

Case in point.  

I just heard something at the door downstairs.  

"Are you still down there," I yelled----at about the same volume as those commercials of 12-12-12.

Nobody answered, so I assumed it was just Todd and Brooke (the grandpuppies) wandering about the house downstairs.

A minute or so later, I heard the back door open downstairs.

"Are you down there?" I yelled again at 12-12-12 commercial volume.

No answer.  Nothing.

Then, I got to wondering how those dogs could open and close the door.

So, I left my perch here at the blog, walked downstairs to figure out the mystery and saw Bill standing at the kitchen island.

"I just yelled and asked if you were down here," I told him.

"I didn't hear you," he responded.

"Well, then from now on, you're going to have a hard time hearing those commercials, " I informed him.  

Bill didn't seem too impressed about that situation until I told him about today's christening of the CALM Act.

So far, this morning, the new law hasn't done much to calm me down, especially knowing my husband's hearing has gotten that bad. 


I bet his hearing deficiency has developed cuz of those LOUD commercials.

Next time they advertise hearing aids on TV, I'll have to find the remote and turn the volume up for Bill.  

1 comment:

Word Tosser said...

if it ever gets bad enough.. I suggest Costco... they do the test and they have reasonable aides.. we like ours.. (yes Ken got some at the same time...we can't blame it on the other guy
so if the need comes. make an appt. with them.. guy is a really nice guy with a great sense of humor