Thursday, April 04, 2013
I have an important, life-changing interview today. When it happens, I'll be wearing weather-beaten hiking shoes, jeans, a polo shirt and a sweater.
I don't think I'll worry about touching up my hair or even brushing my teeth.
Since I don't chew gum, I don't have to worry about remembering to spit it out before the all-important interview begins.
And, to top it all off, I'm not even nervous.
I WAS nervous the last time I endured a similar interview, but when it lasted maybe three-five minutes, I wondered, "Why the worry?"
Today's interview is supposed to start at precisely at 11 a.m., so I do intend to be on time.
I don't even have to drive anywhere----just have to be next to my phone.
I think I'll sit through the interview upstairs cuz if the phone doesn't ring at precisely 11 a.m., I like to be busy and computer work can take up the slack time.
Today's Q and A should be a snap. It's a Social Security sign-up day, of sorts.
If it's anything like last year's Medicare interview, they'll ask me some really hard questions, like my snail mail address and maybe even my mother's maiden name.
Then, they'll ask for my check routing number, and finally, they'll ask, "Do you have any questions?"
I'll say no. They'll say "thank you," and then we'll hang up.
I DO think, however, that I'll bring an accessory upstairs in addition to my checkbook.
After we hang up, I'll happily punch it.
You see we have a Staples "That Was Easy" button, and if I'd known the Medicare interview last year was such a piece of cake, it would have been fun to punch the button.
So, today I'm looking forward to punctuating my Social Security interview with an added grand finale.
I can remember as a youngster when people talked about Social Security and getting images in my mind of white-haired, wrinkled codgers with knitted shawls, hunched over in rocking chairs.
That was before Lady Clairol and mountain bikes.
I'm not feeling so bad because prior to my Social Security interview, I went for an 8-mile bike ride through the Selle Valley last night. Saw 16 elk in a field over in Jacobsonville too.
My hair is not white. It's fake color, of course, and the only rocking chair we have around here doesn't get much use, 'cept for company.
Amos came the other night. He's 39 and he sat in the rocking chair while we 60-somethings sat on the couches.
Now, I will admit to wrinkles. Too much time in the sun and no money or desire for a facelift, just yet anyway.
If I keep looking in the mirror after receiving my first Social Security check, that may change.
But then again, I don't think my Social Security income is gonna foot the bill for any plastic surgery.
I mentioned a knitted shawl. Hmmm. Not shawl one in this household.
So, I guess the image created in early life of the Social Security recipient has changed a bit.
Nonetheless, I'm sure the desire to receive that check promptly every single month for the rest of my life probably matches up with that of all Social Security recipients of times past.
Anyway, today marks the beginning of an official, well-documented new chapter in life----if I pass the interview phase, that is.
Knowing facts---correct facts, that is----is getting more challenging by the day. So, I'm glad I didn't wait until 70 to endure this interview and to start collecting.
Besides, by then, I might have misplaced my "That Was Easy" button.