Saturday, February 27, 2016

Saturday Slight: Lobotomy, Anyone?

It was truly a dog-day afternoon yesterday when the Border Collie Nation Plus One enjoyed some leisurely play time in the pleasant February sunshine.

I took them to the northeast corner of the hay field, where I feel it's safe for them to hang out these days. 

And, hang out they did, chewing on sticks, pine cones and each other while basking in that lovely sunshine.

Twas a fabulous afternoon for such things, including some pruning and cleaning in the garden surrounding the small kennel where Liam can play safely while his buddies hang out keeping an eye on him. 

There came a time during my afternoon project that I even removed my sweater after earlier removing my coat.  

We were blessed this week with some lovely days.  This morning the sun is gone, but it's still warm and the rainfall is pretty moderate.  

Crows are cawing, frogs are croaking, geese are honking and the outdoor world in general seems to be function as one giant stage for critters to sing their songs of spring. 

Bill is off in Montana for a Society of American Foresters overnight gathering at the Lubrecht Forest north of Missoula and up the Blackfoot River.

From the website: 

Lubrecht Experimental Forest is a 28,000 acre forest located 30 miles northeast of Missoula, Montana in the Blackfoot River drainage. 

The Montana Forest and Conservation Experiment Station, at the College of Forestry and Conservation, owns and manages 21,000 acres. 

The other 7,000 are managed cooperatively with the State of Montana Department of Natural Resources.

University of Montana students and faculty use Lubrecht for study and research. Student clubs also hold club activities on the forest. Members of the public use Lubrecht Forest for recreation, for conferences, weddings, and other special events.

The nordic ski trails at Lubrecht are groomed and maintained by the Missoula Nordic Ski Club.

Years ago, my brother Jim, my sister-in-law Joyce and I went cross country skiing at the those ski trails.   I remember that it was a gorgeous, crisp winter day with sunshine aplenty.  

I also remember something about hard-boiled eggs, maybe Jim eating a few and later getting very, very sick on the way home.

Except for that, I recall it being a very fun day in yet another beautiful spot on earth. 

Bill sounded pretty impressed with the place when he called yesterday afternoon.  He was also impressed that another Love (from Seely Lake)  was attending the gathering.  This one is from Montana; his name is Tim.  

Bill has met him before and reported that because they run in the forestry circles, they often get asked if they're related.  

With Bill's absence, I'm feeling grateful this morning.  The boogeyman stayed away yet another time while I was "home alone."  

I doubt that I'll ever get to the point of feeling calm, relaxed and safe while enduring the "home alone"  overnighters, but I'm getting better at at least attaining a comfort zone.  

Every possible door is locked, so much so that once last year, I locked myself out of the house IN THE DARK, realizing so, only after shutting a door behind me. 

That realization had me reeling for a while until after trying every window around the house, I found one that WAS NOT LOCKED SHUT.  

Thank God for Annie that night, who had, a few days before, complained about how hot it was in the living room and opened a window. 

Fortunately, when it was closed, nobody latched it. 

The sight of my maneuvering my body through that narrow opening and sliding first on to the couch and then the floor would have certainly provided fodder for a viral video.  BUT nobody was around with a camera.  Thank God. 

Last night I slept relatively well for most of the night except for a couple of times when Foster would whine, hoping I'd put him outside.  

"No way," I told him. "You're staying in this house."  All I would need is for Foster to go out there in the darkness, hang out for a while and make me go out in the darkness looking for him.  

So, he stayed put and eventually quit the whining.  

I did mention lobotomy in my title, didn't I?  

Well, after another week of insane and disturbing circus politics and realizing that the biggest clowns of all seem to be rising to the top, I'm thinking the only way to avoid total misery over the next several years is to have a lobotomy.  

A lifetime's worth of values, which were taught to me directly or indirectly by my parents, friends, mentors and society in general, suddenly seem to have thrown out the window---not only by the people running for the highest office in the United State but sadly by a scary number of voters. 

I've learned over the past several months that bullying, name-calling, infantile behavior, mean-spiritedness, ignorance, hypocrisy, blatant arrogance, etc. nowadays are fully "trumping" fairness, respect for others and the office of President, compassion, truth, high-minded ideals, common sense, open-mindedness and general decency, etc. 

In watching the spectacle, I, like many folks whom I've talked to, have wondered every single day  what a future looks like in this country if such a dysfunctional circus act takes over.  

One day this week, while cleaning my barns, I came up with another option short of moving out of the country. After all, I still like it here in Selle, so what to do, what to do???  And, the answer came into my head, with the roar of a ballpeen hammer. 

Why not a lobotomy?????? 

I could go to a brain surgeon, maybe Ben Carson, and have that portion of my noggin removed which contributes to opinion, common sense, emotions in general.  

From that day forth, I could sit back, relax and blissfully enjoy CNN, which must be packing away millions with its infinite broadcasting of every slimy detail coming from the mouths of candidates and from all those unprincipled psychophants hoping for inclusion in whatever new administration takes over. 

Whenever I heard another stunningly disgusting, mind-boggling assertion, my new brain would guide me just like author Kurt Vonnegut guided mama Hazel Bergeron's brain in his classic short story "Harrison Bergeron."  

The second I heard the latest, most incredulous statement, I could just announce to my sleeping dogs, "Boy, that was a doozy, wasn't it?"

Yup, a lobotomy may just be the answer!

Since I still have most of my brainpower, I am remembering the big game tonight when Gonzaga takes on BYU at the Marriott Center.

It would be nice if the Bulldogs could defeat the Cougars, and, if that happens, I'll happily announce to all the world, "Boy, that was a doozy, wasn't it?"


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