Good bye, dear Friend

Back then New Zealand was a faraway, enchanting and almost mythical place in my mind---as close to Heaven as anyone could care to get. Everything I read about the country in books expressed the same theme. Beautiful place. Wonderful, generous and friendly people. Sheep. Green. All music to my ears.

When I heard that we had an exchange student at our high school from New Zealand, I wasted no time tracking her down. Her name was Sally. I heard later that Sally would be leaving and going back home, so I tracked her down again and begged her to find me a penpal from her country.

That was back in the early '80s. Not long after Sally left, a thick letter came in the mail. Sally had honored my wishes and asked her older sister Robyne to be my penpal. I was ecstatic. Now, I could learn more about this fascinating place. Lord knows I'd never be able to go there.

The letters went back and forth over the years. Along with them, pictures of family and places and little gifts. Robyne had two daughters, one Annie's age. One Christmas a stuffed unicorn came from Sarah to Annie. Robyne wrote profusely about and sent clippings from New Zealand newspapers about her other daughter Giselle who studied and excelled at opera.

Robyne lovingly spoke of her husband Steve, a land surveyor and competitive sailor. From the photos I could tell that Steve was an athletic, good-looking man. He traveled New Zealand a lot to do his work.

The years passed. The letters continued to come. And, with every letter I got goosebumps while reading Robyne's updates. I longed to some day go to New Zealand and meet my penpal.

The allure, by this time had spread. My daughter Annie was in her senior year at Boise State and getting ready to go on a student exchange. New Zealand was her first choice. Soon, she was headed off from Spokane Airport on one of the most tearful Fourth of July holidays I'd ever endured. She was going so far and would be gone for six months.

Still, though, during that six months, she would surely have time to meet Robyne. One day I received a note from Annie, telling me she had traveled from Hamilton to Lake Taupo where Robyne and Steve live.

"Mom, you should meet them," Annie told me. "They are such nice people, and Robyne would love for you to come." A few days later, the temptation was too much. Soon, I had travel arrangements to set off by myself on that long journey down under to see my daughter and to meet my dear friend in person.

Annie was right. They were truly wonderful people; they felt like family. We enjoyed delightful dinners at their home on two different occasions. Robyne pulled out the stack of photos from North Idaho she had saved over the years. The bond was evident and lasting. I came away, hoping a time would come when Robyne and Steve could come here and visit us.

After all, they would love it in Sandpoint because Sandpoint is so much like Taupo---the big lake, the high mountains, drop-dead beauty.

Just before Christmas Robyne sent me a lovely photo album and her customary hand-written letter with news. Steve would be working in Australia, and she would join him. Just after Christmas I sent Robyne our new Lake Pend Oreille guidebook, still hoping that some day Steve, the sailor, would be lured to come try out sailing on our lake.

I did not hear back from Robyne, which was unusual. Then, one morning I opened my email and read a message from Giselle. She was sorry to tell me that her mother had been diagnosed with a brain tumor and that she had gone from being healthy to helpless. Surgery was scheduled in Hamilton.

A few days later, Giselle wrote again, telling me that Robyne had come through the surgery very courageously and that decisions on treatment would be made soon. I continued to pray that all would go well and hoped to hear some good news.

Giselle wrote again, this morning: Hi Marianne, I haven't been on the computer for weeks now with Mum being so sick and then she died on Sunday the 28th Feb.

It all happened very quickly, we were with her right to the end and she was incredibly peaceful but also very "with it" - she knew we were all there and we had some incredibly precious time with her.

She was such an inspiration - she never complained once the entire time she was sick, she was very brave, had a huge faith and it showed in her peace and acceptance of what was happening.

We are all heartbroken, but are doing our best to carry on. I just needed to let you know. Sorry it has taken me so long.

This is truly a sad day for me, to learn of the loss of Robyne, my faraway penpal and my cherished friend. It's difficult to adequately articulate the depth of how much this friendship and all that blossomed from it has meant to me over these past three decades.

Robyne and I shared so much in our letters over the years. We also enjoyed a mutual admiration----maybe it was the distance that enhanced it, maybe it was the beautiful setting so far away from each other in which we both lived.

I like to think that this was a friendship, truly meant to be. And, I will always consider Robyne and her family as one of the most special dimensions in my life. I think Annie would agree.

We send our love down under to the Jolly family, and we shall never forget the wonderful and joyous time spent with Robyne. Now, having been there, I believe she lived her mortal life in the closest place to Heaven one can get. And, now my dear friend with such a beautiful soul is in Heaven.