Friends, Romans, Countrymen, lend me your ears!
I come to speaketh to you on this Tuesday morning.
And, rest easy. I have no plans to praise Caesar.
Never knew the guy.
'Cept for what Shake Shake Shake your Speare told me.
Shakepeare was a loquacious guy, so they all, all those big-name/big-word writers.
If it were so, it was mighty grievous, but a lot of Will's talk made some sense.
He hath written many poems and a whole lot of scary and funny plays.
Yet, some people say that was pretty ambitious.
Yup, I think it was cuz I sure haven't got time to do that much writing
And, I have a computer.
Shakespeare had himself a feather pen or something like that.
He also had to read big fat books to find out stuff that history's made of.
Can you, dear friends, imagine how long it took him to learn all those facts
And, then to write them down with all those big words and metaphors and such.
Yes, Shakespeare was ambitious, and if it were so, it's not his fault.
He was just one smart dude who figured all us dummies needed some culture.
So, he brought many plays onto the scene, and for centuries we have loved them so.
Those stupid kings with nasty wives, young loves, evil demons and lions walking around town.
All that blood, too many suicides, a whole bunch of conniving crooks, crazy dreams and hand washing like we've never seen. If only they'd had those hand sanitizing dispensers.
Keep those ears flapping, friends, cuz I've got more to say about ol' Shakespeare.
He IS old---so old that he probably can't have a Facebook account.
Today's his birthday, though, and you can send him wishes on this his 449th.
Heck, you could even give him a Starbuck's gift card.
Maybe he'd order some witches' brew in a calderon and then make a whole lot of double trouble and toil.
I've got a lot more to say about this Shakespeare guy, but my heart is in that Holy Trinity church with his bones.
I must pause 'til it come back to me.
But first, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE! Hope you blow out all your candles.