Tuesday, September 27, 2016

Gee, That Was a Doozy!

As I admire at this photo of the serene slough running through Dover Bay, recurrent images of a 400-pound hacker sitting on a bed go floating on down the waterway. . . . at least temporarily.  

Then I go back to scratching my head.  

I always thought it was "elephants in the room" or great big gorillas, but never until last night had I envisioned a 400-pound hacker sitting on a bed in some clandestine room somewhere on Earth.

Is this entity a newly discovered addition to the animal kingdom or a new species of gorillas? What the heck is it anyway?

Maybe I'll learn more by watching "Saturday Night Live" this weekend when the creative geniuses---who still remember truth---provide us with a tangible image of a 400-pound something or other rolling around on that bed (with a plateful of spaghetti on the night stand) gleefully hacking away at unsuspecting websites in places yet unknown.

'Til then, I'll just have to imagine the scene and hope this hacker is caught before it establishes a direct connection or even a job in the White House. 

Besides seeing the need for a good, strong handkerchief to curb some obvious nasal distress, the hacker phenom tops my takeaway list from last night's "Great Debate" of suppositions (nice term for 'I just made that up')  on one side and generally researched and credible facts on the other. 

And, I just read this morning that the nasal passage-impaired candidate says it's gonna get tougher next time we get to watch a "great debate."   

Looks like the fall season for TV viewers has scored big with its 2016 debate series.  

I can't wait to see how said fat hacker evolves into a regular caricature with each new episode.  

What's even more interesting is to learn that what we saw last night was really not what we saw.  

In many cases---according to the news as we make it up----what many thought was the winning player among the two verbal pugilists in last night's season opener lost miserably. 

I guess we have just got to get used to the fact that facts really aren't facts.  Instead, all this time they've really just been a figment of imagination, depending on whose imagination is at work at the time. 

Never mind that a lot of imaginations have been putzing along on basically the same page for as long as I've been alive, but we have also learned over the years that change is inevitable and when that change comes from a vivid imagination, GET READY!  

That fact will soon be history.  

OOPS!  No, it won't be history cuz history is what we use to draw conclusions and history is to be forgotten.  

No, that fact will be just become another new figment.  

Stay tuned.

That 400-pound hacker on the bed is gonna take time out from slurping down the spaghetti, sneak into a computer near you and steal any morsal of truth that is floating around in your computer or your brain.

Soon you'll be acting just like Hazel in Kurt Vonnegut's "Harrison Bergeron" every time the sound of a ball peen hammer hitting a milk bottle goes off in her head while she's watching TV debates with her husband George. 

"Gee, that was a doozy," you'll say, and when the hammer goes off again ten seconds later " . . . GEE, that was really a doozy." 

Where's that handkerchief????  Take me back to that serene slough in Dover. 

Happy Tuesday. 


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